If you're here from "20 Things I Learned by 20 Pt. 1", then welcome! Enjoy reading on to find out another 10 things I have learnt from my time on this planet. If you're new here, check out Pt. 1 of this blog series to read points 1-10 here: 20 Things I Learned By 20 Pt. 1 , and then check back in for the final 10 points when you're ready! :)
Let's get straight into it:
11. Feeling nervous or anxious about something, doesn't always mean that you should avoid it.
I am the queen of feeling anxious when going into something unknown, no matter how big or small, but I can guarantee you that 9 times out of 10, whatever it is you're going into is not going to turn out how you think it is. Whether you're trying a new skill (yoga/fitness class, mountain biking etc.), or going for a job interview, feeling nervous or anxious can actually be a great sign. Firstly, you HAVE to get outside of your comfort zone and try new things. This actually kind of ties into point number 1, you need to keep your life interesting and exciting and if you get yourself to try new things, you will fall in love with life and it will never be boring. Secondly, being nervous will cause a few physiological changes in your body, the most important being adrenaline. Have you ever noticed you've gone for an interview, and when you're out of there you have no idea how you just spit the most killer answers back to their questions? It's because the adrenaline and nervousness had your body and brain on high alert, you were geared up for peak performance and it actually helped you do better.
At the end of the day, worst case scenario is that the thing you're nervous about doesn't go as planned. When put into perspective, everything is still okay! It was not life threatening, you're still standing, you are okay, and even if it was a little embarrassing you will move on from it and I bet you you at least learnt something new (maybe even about yourself). We are a bunch of tiny creatures on a floating rock through space, nothing is that serious that it isn't worth trying new things. You don't want to live your life with what if's.
12. Doctor's don't always know best
If you go to a doctor (or any medical professional) with your concerns and their solution or their treatment style or even just their vibe doesn't gel with you, don't just put up with it! There a soooo many alternatives out there and when it comes to your health, you deserve to be working with someone that you feel completely comfortable with. As I've said before, each and every one of us is different, and it's absolutely okay if the first person you see just isn't working for you! They have plenty of patients, you're not going to ruin their life if you switch to someone new that better suits you. Finding professional help should be treated like buying a new pair of jeans. You would never buy a pair of jeans that you tried on and didn't fit, you'd go grab another size!, and you DEFINITELY wouldn't just buy a random pair of jeans without checking the size and probably trying them on first, so don't do the same with your doctor; try em' on for size first.
13. Go and get the STI check
I know it seems awkward and embarrassing to get an STI check, but do you know what's more awkward? Spreading one to everyone you are intimate with, and potentially not knowing about it until everyone else does...This is where I think sex education in schools really lets us down. It doesn't do much to de-stigmatise the realistic practices of safe sex. Instead, it completely focusses on either not having sex, or expecting everyone will use condoms forever for the rest of their lives. Let's be honest, that's not realistic. Things happen, young people make spur of the moment decisions and they just want to have fun. There is a huge gap in the curriculum where young people have no idea what to do or where to go if things don't go completely to plan, and the culture around such incidents are very stigmatised, making them feel judged and like they don't want to speak up about their sexual health. I could go on for days about the huge gaps in the school sex education system, but I won't. Instead I will just re-iterate, please go and get the STI check. It's normal, it's safe, it's smart and it's so important for you and your partners' health.
14. Daily Gratitude's
I used to think writing down gratitude's for your day was boring and a waste of time, but I have to say I have been proven wrong. Every morning I start my day by writing down 5 things I am grateful for. They can be whatever you like, whether it's being grateful for your loving family, or the coffee that is desperately needed to help you wake up and face the day. Writing daily gratitude's puts your mind in a very positive space to start your day, and it shows you that no matter how the day goes, there are 5 whole things that you are grateful for today. I also like to look back on my gratitude's at the end of the day, particularly when it hasn't been a great day, to reflect and remind myself that even though things may have gone wrong, there are always things to look forward to.
15. Having breakfast for dinner is totally acceptable
Have bacon and eggs for dinner, or have leftovers from last nights dinner for breakfast, who cares! As long as you are eating a balanced and nutritional diet (most of the time😉), there are literally no rules. Eat what you feel like eating and enjoy the heck out of it.
16. If you want something, don't buy it unless you still want to buy it a week later
Impulse buying is something I'm definitely guilty of, but I have a rule here that usually works for me in only buying things that I will genuinely use. If I see a product that I want to buy, I will leave it for at least 1 week, and if I come back to the product and still want to buy it/feel like I'll use it then I'll buy it. Of course there are exceptions; If there is a sale that is genuinely "too good to be true", then it would be silly to not buy a product you really want when it is so much cheaper, but as a general rule this has saved me from a lot of purchases that I probably would've regretted.
17. Round Ups are such a great catalyst for your savings
Not all banks have this option, but if you give it a quick Google search there are plenty of banks that offer savings accounts with a "Round Ups" feature. There are minor differences between how each bank uses this strategy, but basically when enabled, each time a purchase is made from your everyday account (usually the one attached to your bank card), the amount of money needed to round the purchase up to the nearest dollar is taken out and put into your savings account.
For example, if you buy your morning coffee for $4.50, your everyday account will be charged $5, with the extra .50c needed to round up to $5 being automatically deposited into the adjoining savings account. This is a great way to gradually save without really noticing the money coming out or putting any effort in to transfer in your savings account.
Here are a few banks that offer Round Ups when you open an everyday and savings account with them:
"Up" Online Bank, By Bendigo Bank
18. Assertiveness is not the same as being rude or aggressive
As someone who is a big people pleaser, I am still trying to put this advice into practice. But as a society, we have created so many strict hierarchies at every point in life that we often feel like we can't express our wants and needs as it would be rude or inappropriate. For example, the phrase "respect your elders" has been around forever, and now often results in young people not speaking up when they are talking to someone older than them despite feeling uncomfortable or offended by the conversation. Even during high school, there were definitely hierarchies of friend groups; the "popular" girls and the "nerds", with so much gossiping going around that it was just easier to shut your mouth than to come across as rude.
But what I've learnt going through these experiences myself and listening to professionals talk about how we communicate, is that having an opinion, voicing it in a respectful way and knowing what you want and need is so important in order to live a happy, healthy and fulfilling life. It is hard at first, and probably something that many have been to nervous to do before, but having an assertive communication style will improve many aspects of your life. Here is the link to a great episode that Alexis Fernandez has done on her podcast "Do you F*****g Mind?" all about The Four Communication Styles
19. Whatever you think you can't make it through, you've said that a million times before, and you've made it through every single time
The unknown is a scary place, and whether it's a job interview, a big move or a breakup, all of these things and more are usually very anxiety inducing. Sometimes it can seem like you won't be able to make it through the next hurdle, and you have absolutely no idea how you'd go about it even if there was a chance you were going to make it. Although this advice doesn't help with constructing a plan to jump whatever hurdle is in front of you, if you're feeling like there's no way you can make it over, just remember that you have made it over soooo many hurdles before this one that you thought for sure you would bomb out on, and you'll make it through this one just the same. Think about how far you've come and how much you grow with every hurdle that you make it over, it's scary but it's a welcomed challenge that you'll look back on and probably wonder why you were ever so nervous about it.
20. You don't have to have everything figured out yet, and you probably never will
I used to think anyone over the age of about 18 was an adult and had their shit together. Now being past that age and well and truly into what I thought were "adult years", I can confirm that I was very wrong. You don't have to have everything figured out, in fact you don't really have to have anything figured out. As long as you wake up everyday and choose to live your life with happiness and kindness, that's all you really need to have worked out. I reckon you don't even really become an adult until after your 30's, and even then I'm pretty sure there will be lot's that I'll still have absolutely no clue about when I ger there. So just relax, and roll with the punches that life throws your way.
Comments
Post a Comment